(WTVM) – "So, last week, something pretty tragic happened in our household."
That's how the sad tale, forever known as "the poopening" begins for Arkansas native Jesse Newton, who posted on his Facebook page that his Roomba and his puppy's excrement met one early morning.
Newton says Evie, the family's dog, used the bathroom in the house – an accident, of course – and it fell on the collision course with the Roomba's regularly-scheduled vacuuming.
"Do not, under any circumstances, let your Roomba run over dog poop. If the unthinkable does happen, and your Roomba runs over dog poop, stop it immediately and do not let it continue the cleaning cycle," Newton wrote. "Because if that happens, it will spread the dog poop over every conceivable surface within its reach, resulting in a home that closely resembles a Jackson Pollock poop painting."
Needless to say, it did not end well. It ended up…messy. Very messy. Newton details the cleaning of his home and the repairing of his $400 Roomba, and the real first-world problems of an expensive cleaning tool smearing dog poop across one's home.
"My Roomba found dog poop and almost precipitated World War III," Newton wrote.
The messy situation was helped in a big way to Roomba's manufacturer, Hammacher Schlemmer, replaced the soiled device. The company also posted to its Facebook page a carpet cleaner for pet accidents. You can find the product here. The company reminds its consumers that this is why their devices have a lifetime warranty.
Newton posted a diagram of the turd-laden track across his home. The post, and the poop's sad saga, has been shared more than 220,000 times since Aug. 9.
Welp. Crap happens. Read the post here.